Memorial Day -- a time for all to respect

Celebrate, commemorate, or observe?

I never thought about what I should be doing on Memorial Day except enjoying a day of relaxation with friends and family -- until the day I looked into the eyes of someone who had fought for our country.

Until I met the families grieving a fallen loved one. Looked through my camera lens to see a young girl, clutching a flower in her hand at the funeral of her father.

Then it became real to me.

So, I will observe Memorial Day as a chance to remember the sacrifice of our heroes. I will commemorate the occasion by showing respect for the brave families who grieve. And I will celebrate in my heart that there are so many who loved our country so much that they gave everything they had to give.

Tiffany

WRIGHTSTOWN, N.J., 9/30/03--Sierra Miller, 6, carries a flower as she leaves the funeral held at the Brigadier General William C. Doyle Veteran's Memorial Cemetery for her father, Sgt. Fred Miller, who was killed in Iraq. -- photo by Tiffany Tompkins-Condie


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Memorial Day images from the various branches of service:

NEW YORK (May 21, 2008) The amphibious assault ship USS Kearsarge (LHD 3) passes by the Statue of Liberty as it steams up the Hudson River during the Parade of Ships for Fleet Week New York 2008. More than 4,000 Sailors, Marines, and Coast Guardsmen will participate in various community relations projects and make a port call to New York City. U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 3rd Class David Danals (Released)



Sterling R. Cale, treasurer, Pearl Harbor Survivors Association Unit 1, salutes his fallen comrades in the rear of the USS Arizona Memorial Monday during the Memorial Ceremony and Interment of James Evans Cory, the first Marine to be buried aboard the Arizona since World War II.



U.S. Marines place flags in the center of Arlington National Cemetery's columbarium during the "Flags In" Tribute to honor America's fallen heroes, May 22, 2008. The Marines, who recently returned from Iraq, are assigned to Marine Barracks Washington, D.C. Defense Dept. photo by Sebastian J. Sciotti Jr.



A patriotic ceremony honoring the service and sacrifice of America's military members is scheduled in the Amphitheater at Arlington National Cemetery for Memorial Day, May 26, 2008. The 140th observance of Memorial Day will be hosted by U.S. Army Maj. Gen. Richard J. Rowe Jr., commanding general, U.S. Army Military District of Washington and Joint Force Headquarters National Capital Region. U.S. Army photo



Airmen watch the flag lowered to half-staff during a special Memorial Day retreat May 15 at Ellsworth Air Force Base, S.D. (U.S. Air Force photo/Senior Airman Marc I. Lane)

Daniel's good buddy fighting for his life

He snores all night and he doesn’t always have the freshest breath. Erin got to choose him from the Bishop Animal Shelter when she was 9 years old and earned all A’s on a report card.

He’s our family buddy, Truman, and he started chemotherapy yesterday for lympho-sarcoma.

I wavered back and forth between telling Daniel or not; there were arguments to be made for both. I shouldn’t throw a worry around his neck that he can do nothing about. Then again, he does get upset when I don’t tell him what’s going on.

I imagine a lot of families face the dilemma of whether to share upsetting news with a family member in the service. Especially the families who have a loved one directly in harm’s way -- I don’t think I would have told Daniel about Truman if he was in Iraq or Afghanistan.

But Daniel is on his way home. In just about two weeks, he will be in his wife’s arms and safe and sound. So, I felt I had to tell him.

The kids used to lay blankets on the floor of the living room when they watched movies. Inevitably Truman would end up in the pile on the floor, happily getting snacks and tummy scratches. He’s a good friend.

Here’s hoping that when Daniel comes home to visit, his good buddy will be here. Looking up expectantly for his treat and a scratch.

Tiffany

Daniel and Truman walk at the DeSoto State Park:


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PACIFIC OCEAN (May 14, 2008) Hospital Corpsman Apprentice Stephanie Gomez and Hospital Corpsman Amanda Vasquez, working as flight deck handlers aboard the Military Sealift Command hospital ship USNS Mercy (T-AH 19), run clear after removing the chains from an MH-60S Seahawk helicopter. Mercy is deployed supporting Pacific Partnership 2008, a humanitarian and civil assistance mission building on friendship between partner nations and strengthening relationships of the past. U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 3rd Class Joshua Valcarcel (Released)



A U.S. Army soldier communicates with fellow soldiers via radio while searching for weapons caches in northwest Shulla, Iraq, May 16, 2008. During the search, the soldiers were harassed by small arms and mortar fire. The soldiers are from Bravo Troop, 1st Squadron, 75th Cavalry, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 101st Airborne Division. (U.S.Army photo by Spc. Charles W. Gill/Released)

Empathize with my vicarious ways!

Someone recently accused me of living vicariously through my children.

According to Webster’s, "vicarious" means “shared in by imagined participation in another’s experience.”

After my initial reaction of anger subsided, I tried to analyze their words, what they meant, and if they were true.

When the kids were small, did I feel every scrape and “owey”? Did I hope and pray they got a place on the team they tried out for? Did I drive to endless games, eat endless greasy McDonald’s for dinner, teach the dance team? Hope that special someone asked them to the prom?

Yup. Not because I wanted those things, but because they wanted those things.

When Daniel joined the Marines, did I read every book, watch every movie, interrogate every Marine I met?

Yup.

I am involved in their lives.

When I get over-involved, Daniel and Erin don’t hesitate to let me know. But the definition of "vicarious" above seems very close to the word "empathy": “the ability to share in another’s emotions, thoughts or feelings.”

So, if you want to accuse me of living vicariously through my children -- have at it! I’m proud to enjoy their experiences, if only in my imagination. And they’ll tell me when I butt-in too much -- they always do!

Tiffany
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A letter from proud mom Gerry Sklenicka, who points out the wonderful work of the Patriot Guard Riders and fills us in on the sendoff of her son, Daniel, to Iraq:

Tiffany,
As much as we love the men in our life, they sometimes forget to include the rather poignant events that shape a family and, in turn, our lives. Therefore, I would like to add that the “homecoming” for Danny, in advance of his deployment to Iraq, was shared with members of the Patriot Guard Riders (PGA) who welcomed him with a caravan of motorcycles, for a surprise to welcome a “hero” home.

The Patriot Guard Riders is a diverse amalgamation of riders from across the nation. They have one thing in common besides motorcycles. They have an unwavering respect for those who risk their very lives for America’s freedom and security.

The PGA’s main mission is to attend the funeral services of fallen American heroes as invited guests of the family. Each mission has two basic objectives.

1. Show our sincere respect for our fallen heroes, their families, and their communities.
2. Shield the mourning family and their friends from interruptions created by any protestor or group of protestors.

They accomplish the latter through strictly legal and non-violent means. As indicated on the PGA home page -– ”To those of you who are currently serving and fighting for the freedoms of others, at home and abroad, please know that we are backing you. We honor and support you with every mission we carry out, and we are praying for a safe return home for all.”

I found out through a dear friend and member of the PGA, that PGA participates in sendoffs and homecoming tributes, as time permits. I requested such a "sendoff/homecoming" from the local PGA participants. Danny was taken aback and thoroughly surprised by the PGA homecoming. He could hear the caravan of motorcycles approaching the house and when he saw several coming down the street he turned to me and said, "Mom, there are like 20 motorcycles coming down the street." I replied, "Yes, I know, they are for you." He had never heard of the PGA, and neither had Dan & I until my friend mentioned it to me. So, for anyone interested:

The website for PGA is here:

I have added additional photos of the surprise welcome we provided for Danny (our hero) during his visit to Bradenton, prior to deployment to Iraq.

Continue to keep all our troops in your prayers.

Gerry Sklenicka




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ANNAPOLIS, Md. (15 May, 2008) Plebes lock arms at the foot of the lard-covered Herndon Monument to form a pyramid for classmates to climb to the top of the 21-foot-tall monument and replace the traditional plebe cap with a midshipman cap during the 101st annual Herndon climb at the U.S. Naval Accademy. The Herndon Climb is a rite of passage symbolizing the end of the midshipmenÕs plebe year. U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Patrick Gordon (Released)



Spc. Timothy Russell, a native of Yardley, Pa.; 1st Lt. Ryan Clay, a native of Durham, N.C.; and Spc. Eric Waddle, a native of Bedford, Ind., enjoy Iraqi cuisine provided by a local sheik during a meeting where military and local leadership discussed security of the East Anbar province, northwest of Baghdad, May 8. Russell and Waddle are mortarmen assigned to Headquarters and Headquarters Company, 1st Battalion, 27th Infantry Regiment “Wolfhounds,” 2nd Stryker Brigade Combat Team “Warrior,” 25th Infantry Division, Multi-National Division – Baghdad. Clay is a mortar platoon leader assigned to HHC, 1st Bn., 27th Inf. Regt. (U.S. Army photo/Staff Sgt. J.B. Jaso III)



PACIFIC OCEAN (May 14, 2008) Marines assigned to the 15th Marine Expeditionary Unit run laps at dawn on the flight deck of the amphibious assault ship USS Peleliu (LHA 5). Peleliu is on a scheduled deployment. U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 3rd Class Dustin Kelling (Released)


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Don't forget the MOTS pizza party Monday!

Monday, May 19th at 5:30 all sons, daughters, brothers and sisters of deployed soldiers are invited to our first Soldier Snack Pack Make-it, Send-it, Take-it Pizza Party. It will be held at the American Legion Kirby Stewart Post 24 located at 2000 75th St W, Bradenton. Special Guest: Psychologist and Mental Health Counselor Robert McGarry will be there to get this important group started on the right foot. Wear your MOTS T-shirt, if you have one, or get one that night. Parents please stay and have pizza with us while the children of all ages do some packing. For more information and to RSVP contact Debi Miele.
Email: mieled@manateeschools.net (she will need number attending, ages, and shirt sizes)

Casualty alerts are painful reality

I signed up for “Google alerts”. I get alerts from the Department of Defense, the Pentagon, the Marine Corps and I don’t know where else. There's lots of information sites out there, each one concerned with their own slice of the pie.

Yesterday I read about a Navy program to embed psychiatric teams on the front lines so they can treat potential victims of PTSD. That’s a good thing? Right? To be proactive with a problem that is so prevalent? Or, should I be worried that this program will preclude troops from treatment later on? And does the Army have something similar?I don’t know. Sometimes programs sound good on paper but in practice are woefully inadequate. I worry about what treatment they will get after they’ve been home for a while. Will somebody be there for them?

Along with news updates come the casualty alerts. One day I was reading my e-mail, saw two casualty alerts, went to get a drink and came back to find two more. My heart sinks when I see those subject lines. So far, I’ve opened the e-mails and breathed a deep sigh of relief that it’s not a familiar name. Then I feel so ashamed. That unfamiliar name is somebody’s husband, wife, son or daughter. I wish I could get the news without the casualty alerts.

Then again, I think I should read each of their names. Every single one. They deserve to be acknowledged and respected.

God bless our troops and families.

Tiffany
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Notes and announcements from Manatee's Operation Troop Support:

At 5:30 p.m. Monday, May 19 all sons, daughters, brothers and sisters of deployed soldiers are invited to our first Soldier Snack Pack Make-it, Send-it, Take-it Pizza Party. It will be held at the American Legion Kirby Stewart Post 24, 2000 75th St W, Bradenton. Special Guest: Psychologist and Mental Health Counselor Robert McGarry will be there to get this important group started on the right foot. Wear your MOTS T-shirt, if you have one, or get one that night. Parents, please stay and have pizza with us while the children of all ages do some packing. For more information and to RSVP contact Debi Miele. Email: mieled@manateeschools.net (she will need number attending, ages, and shirt sizes)

Soldier Snack Packs: Jody and Blake Hadley (You may remember they helped put together the award winning April DeSoto Festival Snack Pack.) Email: jodyahadley@hotmail.com Cell: 730-0848

"Adopting" of a Soldier, Mail Call, Stamps for Soldiers, Magazines for Soldiers, Snacks For Soldiers: Cathy Wilson Email: wilson1c@manateeschools.net

New Manatee Soldiers and Families Recruitment; Corporate Sponsorships; Comment Cards; Lisa Bapst Email: swtlisab@verizon.net Phone: 465-1412
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From proud mom Joann DeSerio about her son, LCpl Daniel Pelletier:

Right now he is a Lance Corporal stationed in NAS Pensacola. He is in Air Traffic Controller School and has just finished his first “Module”. Great grades, heading for modules 2 and 3 next, then I believe this schooling is completed. He will then be heading for a duty station. He just turned 19, he joined last July so he is coming up on 1 year. He is proud and happy to be serving.





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The U.S. Air Force Thunderbirds fly in formation over California in preparation for an upcoming air show. The Thunderbirds are the Air Force's premier demonstration squadron and represent the Air Force throughout the nation and abroad. (U.S. Air Force photo/Senior Airman Matthew Smith)



An F-22 Raptor from the 3rd Wing at Elmendorf Air Force Base, Alaska, rejoins the fight after refueling during Northern Edge 2008 May 8. Twelve Elmendorf AFB F-22s were part of the more than 120 aircraft participating in the largest military training exercise in Alaska. An Alaska Air National Guard KC-135 Stratotanker from Eielson Air Force Base, Alaska's, 168th Air Refueling Wing delivered the fuel during the refueling mission. (U.S. Air Force photo/Tech. Sgt. Mikal Canfield)


U.S. and Iraqi soldiers, visit a shop in Amariyah, Iraq, May 1,2008, to ensures that money given to the shop owner is spent properly and to see how his shop is prospering. The U.S. soldiers are from Comanche Troop, 2nd Platoon, 4th Squadron, 10th Cavalry Regiment, 4th Infantry Division. (U.S. Air Force photo by Staff Sgt. Manuel J. Martinez/Released)

My kids are the best "Mom" gifts

I came home after a long, hot day at work Friday to find a package sitting by the front door. Excited, I tried not to drop any of the bags and cameras from the car as I unlocked the door and eyed the return address at the same time.

It was from Ashley and Daniel, a sweet Mother’s Day gift and card! It was a heart necklace on a delicate chain -- a far cry from the cabinet full of clay ashtrays and assorted other dearly loved “mom” gifts I’ve gotten through the years.

Then, to make it even better, I got a phone call from Daniel from a place a few hundred miles from Antarctica. How exotic sounding! As his buddy lay on a bench nearby and waited for his turn on the phone, Daniel spoke to me for 34 minutes and 6 seconds! It was so good to hear his voice.

He talked about getting packages from Manatee’s Operation Troop Support, and reading the enclosed letters aloud from the class that adopted him while he and his buddies sat in their berths. “Read some more!” they asked. They loved hearing the kids’ letters, which were sweet, funny, and sad, said Daniel.

Today, Erin will be coming by to spend some time with me. There’s nothing more I could ask for to make it a better day. Love from my children -- what a blessing!

Happy Mother’s Day!

Tiffany
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Here's a very sweet letter to share from Dan Sklenicka with two great pictures. Thanks, Dan, for sharing!

Tiffany, First I would like to say your blog is always filled with great stories. Attached is a picture of Danny and his girlfriend Mary Brooks. This picture was taken at USMC air station Yuma, AZ just before Danny boarded the airplane and headed to Iraq. We never had seen this picture of them. I was on Danny’s MySpace Web site and clicked on Mary’s page and there was this picture of them. Under the picture was "LAST NIGHT". WOW, last night.

Danny says all is well over there, working long hours to keep the Harriers up and running and can't wait for some well-deserved sleep time with 12-16 hour work days. Last week Danny e-mailed me to say he was able to experience refueling operations over Iraq. He watched a squadron of F18 hornets refuel in flight out the window of C130 aircraft, a once in a lifetime experience. That is it for now.

Pray for our Boys & Girls safe return.

Dan Sklenicka

Danny home on leave before leaving for Iraq:



Danny and Mary Brooks:


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U.S. Navy sailors "man the ship" and officially bring the newest Virginia-class nuclear attack submarine USS North Carolina (SSN 777) to life during her commissioning ceremony in Wilmington, N.C., on May 3, 2008. The North Carolina is the fourth Virginia-class submarine to be commissioned and the first major U.S. Navy combatant vessel class designed with the post-Cold War security environment in mind. North Carolina will be home ported in Groton, Conn., as a member of the U.S. Atlantic Fleet. DoD photo by Petty Officer 2nd Class Roadell Hickman, U.S. Navy. (Released)



An Iraqi boy stands near U.S. Army Cpl. Christopher Paukei from 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 4th Infantry Division outside a park area in Sadr City, Baghdad, Iraq, on May 3. Coalition and Iraqi forces patrol the area in an effort to determine if new barriers around the city are making the residents feel safe. DoD photo by Tech Sgt. Cohen A. Young, U.S. Air Force. (Released)



U.S. Navy flight deck crew members monitor the safety line before launching an AV-8B Harrier aircraft aboard the amphibious assault ship USS Peleliu (LHA 5) in the Pacific Ocean on May 6, 2008. DoD photo by Petty Officer 3rd Class Dustin Kelling, U.S. Navy. (Released)

Guess I overestimated the lure of beer

So, I guess I am guilty of thinking in clichés. Not all military servicemen with a tiny slice of liberty in a foreign land will head for a pub and a cold drink.

I just got an e-mail from Daniel describing how he was on duty most of the time, but when he got a morning off, he went to a wildlife sanctuary and fed koala bears. He was pretty stoked about it -- “awesome,” he said.

Maybe I was projecting. After months on a ship with co-workers, what would I want to do with my day in Australia? I’m so glad he didn’t miss a wonderful opportunity.

Now we’re all trying to make plans for his visit home -- no small task when everyone wants their own, special time. Daniel won’t get any days off when he gets back to San Diego. The Sea Elks have to make sure all the helicopters get back to the airfield and are in top shape.

And I’m sure Daniel and Ashley, still newlyweds, need time to reconnect and catch up -- they missed each other terribly.

So I’ll try not to be a time hog when they come out mid-June. I’ll let the grandparents and aunts and uncles and friends and Ashley’s family all have their time. As long as I get to hear his stories and hug him and shoot lots of photos, it’ll be great!

Tiffany
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Please keep sending me photos and updates of your loved ones!
Ttompkins@bradenton.com
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Important contact info for Manatee's Operation Troop Support:

Soldier Snack Packs: Jody and Blake Hadley (You may remember they helped put together the award-winning April DeSoto Festival Snack Pack.)Email: jodyahadley@hotmail.com Cell:730-0848

"Adopting" of a Soldier, Mail Call, Stamps for Soldiers, Magazines for Soldiers, Snacks For Soldiers: Cathy Wilson Email:wilson1c@manateeschools.net

May 19th soldier Snack Pack: Make-it, Send-it, Take-it Pizza Party: Debi Miele Email: mieled@manateeschools.net

New Manatee Soldiers and Families Recruitment; Corporate Sponsorships; Comment Cards; Lisa Bapst Email: swtlisab@verizon.net Phone: 465-1412
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To join the wives/fiances/girlfriend's support group, call:

Erica Harden
Proud Wife of Sgt. John Harden
Cell Phone (941)779-8763
Home Phone (941)776-0211
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From around the globe, our military at work:

U.S. Army Captain Paul Goodfellow (left) speaks to a family about activity in the city and any concerns they may have during a cordon and knock operation May 2 in Tikrit, Iraq. Goodfellow is assigned to Alpha Company, 1st Special Troop Battalion, 1st Brigade Combat Team, 101st Airborne Division. DoD photo by Staff Sgt. Micky M. Bazaldua, U.S. Air Force.(Released)



WILMINGTON, N.C.(May 3, 2008) Crew members render salutes as they officially bring the newest Virginia-class nuclear attack submarine USS North Carolina (SSN 777) to life during her commissioning ceremony. North Carolina is the fourth Virginia-class submarine to be commissioned and the first major U.S. Navy combatant vessel class designed with the post-Cold War security environment in mind. North Carolina will be homeported in Groton, Conn., as a member of the U.S. Atlantic Fleet. U.S. Navy photo by Chief Mass Communication Specialist Lucy M. Quinn (Released)

Mates, let's be proud as a rat with a gold tooth

G’day Mates and Sheilas!

The USS Tarawa has docked for a weekend of liberty in Fremantle, Australia. According to a news website there, the temperature is 24 and ‘fine’. I’m sure the first thing they’ll do when they get off the boat is call their ‘oldies’ (Australian for parents), then stroll through some of the town’s 10 formal parks and gardens. Maybe they’ll slip into a museum here and there to fill themselves with culture and learning.

More likely, they’ll be ‘hitting their kick’ (opening their wallet) at the “Sail and Anchor” or “Clancy’s Fish Pub” and getting ‘full as a boot’ (drunk) 'till they’re ‘grinning like a shot fox’ or ‘proud as a rat with a gold tooth’ (happy).

It’ll be good to get off their ‘plate of meat’ (feet) and settle down to some good ‘grog’ with their ‘pallies’ (friends). More than likely, they’ll end up ‘green around the gills’, but hopefully none of them will ‘heave’ (get sick) on any of the ‘Joe Bloggs’ (average citizens).

Soon, they’ll be saying ‘hooroo’ (goodbye) to Australia, back on their way home with a short stop in Hawaii. Can’t wait 'till they are saying ‘Aloha’!

Tiffany
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Here is an Australian news story about the USS Tarawa coming to Fremantle:


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Here's a note from Dan Mustaine, whose daughter, Trista, appears on the cover of a Congressional report. If you'd like to read it, e-mail me and I will send it. Here's Dan's note:

I am sending along an 85 page report (in PDF) received from Trista on 5/1/08. Everyone always asks what she is doing so I thought this was the best way to tell you-all. This is a congressional report and just happens to have her picture on the front page. WOW ! ! ! ! Not that I am proud of her or anything...

Hope it brings some meaning to this war. I found that this kind of thing never gets any media attention.

Thanks for your support

Dan & Zan

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Just wanted to send you the picture from our meeting Friday night. We had so much fun!!!!
Our next meeting is going to be a challenging game of bowling on Friday at 7pm and the
AMF Bowling Alley on Cortez! Those pictures should be hysterical.
Thanks so much for all you guys are doing. We appreciate it so much.

Erica Harden
Proud Wife of Sgt. John Harden
Cell Phone (941)7798763
Home Phone (941)7760211


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U.S. Staff Sgt. Brian Miliefsky preflights a C-130J Hercules aircraft for a mission at Bagram Air Field, Afghanistan, on April 29, 2008. Miliefsky is a load master assigned to the 774th Expeditionary Airlift Squadron and deployed from the 115th Airlift Squadron, Channel Island Air National Guard Station, California Air National Guard, Port Hueneme, Calif. DoD photo by Master Sgt. Andy Dunaway, U.S. Air Force. (Released)


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I met Staff Sgt. Scott Kovach at the "Love for Lexi" fundraiser Saturday at Braden River High. What a nice young man! He is very willing to help parents find resources available to them, and can be reached at the U.S. Army Recruiting Station at 4533 14th St. W in Bradenton. His office number is (941) 756-8491.


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A sailor stationed at Naval Air Station Key West spots a rare rainbow halo in the skies over the air station. According to the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, the halo, which typically indicates rain is on the way, is a ring of colored or white light that encircles the sun when seen through a cloud of ice crystals. U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Timothy Cox (Released)


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I got this happy note from Michael Falkoski's mom:

Hi, Michael is due to leave Al Udied air base on or about May 7th and will be home to Bradenton on May 13th we will all be happy to have Michael back on American soil again safe and sound and are looking forward to having him home for a week. He will be visiting his nephew James third grade class at Bashaw Elementary School while he is here. I would also like to let your readers know that during the month of May Kmart stores will be featuring a wall of honor to honor our service men both past and present, so anyone interested can bring in there pictures to be displayed. I hope you can pass this along as this is the second year we are doing this, and I hope we have a little more community participation this year. I am employed at the Manatee Ave store and would like to have a large display this year.

Marilyn

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Info from Manatee's Operation Troop Support:

Monday, May 19th at 5:30 all sons, daughters, brothers and sisters of deployed Soldiers are invited to our first Soldier Snack Pack Make-it, Send-it, Take-it, Pizza Party. It will be held at the American Legion Kirby Stewart Post 24 located at 2000 75th St W, Bradenton. Wear your MOTS t-shirt, if you have one, or get one that night. Parents please stay and have pizza with us while the children of all ages do some packing. For more info contact Debi Miele. Email: mieled@manateeschools.net

New Manatee Soldiers and Families Recruitment; Corporate Sponsorships; Comment Cards; Lisa Bapst Email: swtlisab@verizon.net Phone: 465-1412